Teach Your Children Well

Certain stories I tell as much as I can. They haunt me because of their truth and their consequences.

I have to admit that it shocked me to learn that most teenagers who abuse alcohol get their first drink from their parents. A lesson in poor parenting. I can hear some say, "They are going to get it so they might as well learn how to drink at home." To this I suggest the following--timing is everything. The average age for this to happen is way too young--early adolescent. And in our culture, a parent giving alcohol to their kids is not a crime. It just does not add up. For those who are shaking their head at me, read on. It is a true story.

It was graduation night. You remember how it was when you graduated. Maybe you remember the graduation from High School or perhaps it is college. This one was from High School.

Mom and Dad knew that their daughter was going to be celebrating. She was spending the night with friends. Little did they know how their life would change.

About two o'clock, the phone rang. You hope that when the phone rings at this time it is a wrong number. Unfortunately this one was not. The voice on the other end of the phone gave them bad news. Their daughter was in a very bad wreck. They needed to get to the hospital.

The parents rushed to the hospital to find their worst nightmare was no longer a dream. Their daughter was driving home. The car left the road. She left their life. Graduation was not what it was supposed to be. It was supposed to be a beginning. Now it was an end.

The father went to the scene of the accident. He had to see it with his own eyes. The car was mangled beyond belief. As he looked in the car, he found the empty bottle. In a rage, he swore to himself, "I will find the one who gave this to my daughter. They will pay!"

Numbed by grief, he made his way home. The house was dark with despair. His life was forever changed. He sat at his table and wept. As he looked around, he noticed that the door to his own liquor cabinet was open. As he went to close the door, he noticed a slip of paper. He recognized the writing immediately. It was a note from his daughter, "Dad, borrowed a bottle to celebrate. Did not think you would mind. Love, Susie."

He taught his daughter.

Fathers, Mothers, teach your children by example the virtues of life. Stay on the high road--life will bring the low road more readily than one can imagine. Parenting, like life, is a gift.

It's Friday But Sunday's a Coming!

He died. Stone cold dead.

Death has a way of paralyzing humans regardless of most circumstances. It is where we meet our mortality. All of us will die.

When Jesus died, there must have been great confusion for the disciples and followers. They had seen him heal the sick. They had witnessed his miracles. The disciples were convinced death would not come even though Jesus spoke of it. They could not believe their eyes. "What now?" they must have asked themselves.

In these moments of confusion, one can do great harm to one's self. The inability to make decisions, the lack of self care, or withdrawal from life can have a devastating affect on our relationships. It is one of the most dangerous times in our life in terms of emotional, spiritual and physical health. If you find yourself responding in this manner, please reach out! Find someone who can lead you to a new place or space in life.

The death of a child is one of the most significant events in life. I did not realize how much so until I watched my parents struggle with the death of my two sisters. Life was out of order. Parents are not supposed to bury their children. Parents are supposed to watch their children grow up. Children are supposed to bury parents.

The only way out of the paralysis and despair is through Christian hope. Christian hope believes that death does not have the final word. Christian hope walks us through the valley--it does not leave us in the valley. Christian hope assures us that the loved one is safe and secure. God does not leave God's children.

But yet, the Christian faith has to have the Good Fridays of life. It is there that we realize just how deep God's love is for all of the world. The death of Jesus points us to our own death but also it points us to our own eternal life. There is a famous sermon delivered years ago by an African American pastor that proclaimed the darkness of Friday--Mary crying, the suffering of Jesus, the despair of the disciples. But then he proclaims the hope--it's Friday but Sunday is a comin!

God is not finished. God will see us through the darkness that comes before the dawn. It's Friday, but Sunday's a comin!

Be a WIT Christian

One of the dangers of the Christian faith is to confuse God's will with our own will. I hear people talk about doing the will of God while it is quite evident that his/her life is so far from God's kingdom. It is quite clear that the person is following his/her own will and just asking God to sign off on it. This practice of faith leads one to ruins. Then of course, the person wants to blame God for all of life's failures and ruins.

After WWII, Leslie Weatherhead wrote a small book entitled, The Will of God. It is a classic in Christian literature. It poses the question, "How does one know the will of God?" The discussion begins with a question that some would never ever ask. Was it God's will that Jesus die on the cross?

For some Christians, the question is mute. For others it can become a focal point for understanding God's will in life. The answer that Weatherhead initially gives is that in the intentional will of God, God did not want Jesus to die on the cross. God intended for humanity to accept Jesus' teachings of love and the kingdom of God. If the world had been perfect, this is what God intended.

But we all know the perfect world does not exist. Therefore, given the present circumstance of humanity, God asked Jesus to do whatever it takes (WIT) to show humanity how much God loves them. Whatever it takes! Even if it means being spit on, beaten, and dying on the cross? Yes! Whatever it takes.

I am wondering how the world would change if Christians adopted the WIT philosophy of Jesus. I am willing to do whatever it takes to show the world the love of God. I will cross social boundaries. I will fight demons. I will bless all that is around me to feed the hungry. I will let the world make fun of me even take my life--whatever it takes--for the love of God.

This idea of the will of God is quite different from the self satisfying no sacrifice idea of God's will. It is not God signing on to our agenda, but God leading us. Most of the time where God leads us can be a bed of roses but remember that roses have thorns. And even if life looks like ruins (i.e. the cross) let us not be fooled. It is only Friday, Sunday is a coming!

The ultimate will of God will reign. This is where God does what God can only do. The ultimate will of God is when the tomb is empty. The ultimate will of God is eternal, not made by human hands. You see, ultimately God does not leave us. God reigns.

In the meantime, I think the will of God is know best by those who practice WIT Christianity--I will do whatever it takes Lord!

Be With One Another

Email has given us a great opportunity to communicate. Texting has added to our capacity to respond in just a second. Now there are programs or phones that work like walkie talkies that allow you to speak your message. By the time I retire, you will just read my thoughts. Or maybe you had better not do that!

And yet, we struggle to communicate. I think it is a part of the human paradox. We have all the capabilities but still just can't quite pull it off.

I think that is where the intent of the will comes in. You see each day we decide what we will do or what we will say. Oh there are givens in life, but ultimately, it is the decision of our will--or theologians call it, our free will--to choose who to believe or who to trust. More importantly we choose how we will live our life.

I spent this afternoon spending time with two of my four grandkids. They are visiting from Germany. My son-in-law, Drew, is in the Air Force and serves our country there. I chose to lay down all the work that needed to be done and be a grandpa.

It was a great afternoon learning how to communicate. The grandkids are three and one year old. Talking to kids that age is an adventure. My grandson, Caiden, would say something as if I would understand all of it. There were times I had no idea what he was saying but caught all of the emotion of what he was saying. Caroline, the one year old, is at the point where she mimics things you do. How much fun that it is to watch!

We played with dinosaurs. We drew chalk figures on the sidewalk. We ate cookies--cooked and uncooked. The two of them were bottomless pits with more energy than I ever remember having in a lifetime. There is no doubt that tonight that when Mandy and I go to bed, we both will be exhausted. But oh, what a blessing. Their presence in our world is a gift.

I think this is what God must feel with me sometimes. God makes me the focus of the world to hear me yak and spend time with me. God loves to hear the children of the world play with each other. God loves to see our creativity, imagination, and our energy.

As I am writing this, Mandy, Caiden, and the dinosaurs are making pancakes. My plate is being filled. The imagination of a child is truly a gift from God.

When Jesus' good friend, Lazarus died, Martha met Jesus with the words, "if you had been here...." The presence of Jesus would have made a difference. The thought of not being there--maybe that is why Jesus wept. There is great value to spending time with family and friends. The blessing of time is maybe one of the determining factors in life's relationship.

Maybe all this technology is helpful, but it never replaces the ability to laugh and play--putting away all the things that need to be done--just to be with one another. My prayer is that today my grandkids, my daughter and son-in-law felt my love for them.

Take time. Be with one another. Be with God.