It is graduation time. Seniors are now looking back or forward. College grads are now looking for or beginning jobs. And then there is kindergarten graduations. Kindergarten? We now graduate from kindergarten?
I must admit that I was kicked out of kindergarten. My mom tells me that my friend, P.C. and I were allowed to go to kindergarten one day. The teacher told them not to bring us back. I have no memory of this. It is an oral tradition in the family that mom rarely speaks about. I am sure that it did not involve bodily harm or anything too serious or I would remember the consequences.
For those who do not know, there was a day (just as we got off Noah's ark) when you just completed a grade in school without such fanfare. There was a note at the bottom of your final report card that told you that you were promoted. You did not wear a cap and gown. There was no limo to carry you to the final school program. You carried a small token of appreciation to your teacher the last day. Then you were given a hug as you left and the teacher breathed a sigh of relief as you left!
There is a story about a little boy that was crying so badly as he left his first grade classroom. The teacher consoled him and asked him why he was so upset. He explained, "if only you were smart enough to teach the second grade, you could be my teacher next year too!"
So why does kindergarten graduation concern me?
i agree with James Dobson, a noted Christian author and medical doctor. We have forgotten the importance of delayed gratification in rearing our children. It is a very important part of human development. We are leaving very little for our children to experience as they grow up. By the time our children are fourteen or fifteen, the only thing they have not done is have a baby and/or kill someone. So teenage pregnancy and teenage deaths or involvement in crime continue to rise. Could there be a connection?
I know a four year old that has a facebook page. Some kids will have so many trophies in their rooms by the time they are ten that when they get to young adult age they will have no motivation to excel anymore. They will be bored with what rewards can be offered.
When did parenting become giving the child everything they want before the age of six or seven? When did delaying gratification lose its place in helping our children become mature and productive young adults? May I share some vital information with young parents. NO is not a bad word. In fact, NO can be the most important words that your kids learn. You tell your children, "This is something you will experience LATER in life" regardless of what other parents allow their kids to do.
Maybe children need to wear a cap and gown when they graduate from high school? Maybe our children need to ride in a limo when they get married? Maybe parents and organizations should save some gratification for when kids grow up. I know it is not as cute. I know it takes away those pictures. But just think with me. What is more important--cute pictures, sentimental moments or mature productive ALIVE kids?
I know it is an argument or point that is not popular and I will not win over cultural gratification. I know I am portrayed as an "old grumpy old man". Some will call me archaic and old fashioned But maybe it is costing us more than we want to pay.
Pray for me as I pray for you.
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